You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing! GCFL is an acronym for the Good, Clean Funnies List.
GCFL.net is a web page and mailing list for distributing one GOOD, CLEAN joke a
day, five days a week, for free!
We hope you will enjoy a joke in the morning before
the start of your day that you will want to share with your family and
friends.
If you like your email box filled with jokes both clean and rated, you should
join any one of the other humor lists. However, if you want only one joke a
day (no more than five per week) that are clean enough to share with your
family and friends, GCFL.net is the list for you.
To get GCFL via email, type in your email address in the space on the left
and click the subscribe button! It is that easy! | Good, Clean Funny of the Day | Friday, May 22, 2026 |
M&M Genetics   
Date: Sent Friday, May 22, 2026
Category: None | Rating: 3.20/5 (30 votes)
Click a button to cast your vote
|
|
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M
duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the
"loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue
M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a
mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions
it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it
neatly in an envelope and send it to:
M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc. Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503
along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside
the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
There can be only one.
Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
|
|
