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View Funnies Friday, April 19, 2024

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Random Acts of Thinking
Date: Sent Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Category: None
Rating: 3.66/5 (177 votes)
Click a button to cast your vote
012345

I want to become a vegetarian, but I'm not sure I can quit eating meat cold turkey.

I wear glasses. Doesn't that mean that *everything* I see is an optical illusion?

I paid my psychiatrist with a reality check.

Do fishermen live in the reel world?

You want to know a really, really hugely annoyingly bad habit? Over-exaggeration.

I may not be a great artist, but I am really good at drawing a blank.

My wife and I love each other. I rub her back and she massages my ego.

When he who lives in a glass house invites he who is without sin for dinner, bad things can happen.

You can't stop progress, but you can unplug a good chunk of it.

A chrysanthemum by any other name ... would be easier to spell.

Some days the best thing about my job is that the chair spins.

My life no longer needs an extreme makeover. Now it just needs a complete do over.

A friend of mine has a nose ring. She keeps the volume pretty low, though, and sets it to "vibrate" at the movies.

I'm not too handy with tools. I once got my finger caught in a screwdriver.

Yesterday I pushed my luck. It was clearly too weak to move by itself.

- from Mark Mail

Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.


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