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View Funnies Thursday, March 28, 2024

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UNASSIGNED: This funny is in the 'unassigned' queue which means it has been picked to be mailed out to the mailing list, but has not been assigned a date yet. It may or may not have been checked by the editors, so don't be surprised if you find a grammar error or two. Of course, it could be removed or shuffled to another queue at any time. Your votes help us decide if a funny should be mailed out (or not). Please give your opinion by voting.

Surviving Dull Sermons
Date: No date scheduled
Category: None
Rating: 2.55/5 (89 votes)
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Ways to Survive Even the Dullest of Sermons


- Pass a note to the organist asking whhether he/she plays requests

- See if a yawn really is contagious

- Slap your neighbor. See if they turn the other cheek. If not, raise your hand and tell the minister.

- Devise ways of climbing into the balccony without using the stairs

- Listen for the speakers to use a wordd beginning with 'A' then 'B and so on through the alphabet.

- Sit in the back row and roll a handfuul of marbles under the pews ahead of you. After the service, credit yourself with 10 points for every marble that made it to the front

- Using church notice-sheets or newcomeers cards for raw materials, design, test and modify a collection of paper airplanes.

- Raise your hand and ask for permissioon to go to the lavatory.

- Whip out a hankie and blow your nose.. Vary the pressure exerted on your nostrils and trumpet out a rendition of your favorite hymn.

- By unobtrusively drawing your arms upp into your sleeves, turn your shirt inside out.

- Try to raise one eyebrow

- Think about your chin for an entire mminute

- Twiddle your thumbs

- Twiddle your neighbor's thumbs

- Wiggle your ears so that the people bbehind you will notice

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.


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